T.H.I.N.K. || Tips for better conversations.

We’ve all heard, “Think before you speak”.

On the surface it seems easy enough. Just think through what and how you’d like to say before blurting it out. Honestly, sometimes thinking before speaking is a little easier said than done. So how do you do it? I recently heard a variation of the following and it’s helped to improve conversations with my partner. We thought we were great communicators but now our conversations are now much more meaningful! Hopefully these tips can help you too.

Before you say anything, ask yourself the following.

Is what I am going to say…

T: True

Truthful? Speaking truthfully builds trust and conveys character and strengthens bonds.

H: Helpful

Helpful or hurtful? If something we would like to say is helpful, it’s important to say it in a gentle way that isn’t hurtful. The words we select can wound or heal others.

I: Important

Actually important? When we are more selective with what we say, we’ll find that others listen more intently.

N: Necessary

Necessary or unnecessary? Does the listener(s) need to hear what I’m about to say? Is this a good time to share? Timing really is everything. Find the right time to say what you need to.

K: Kind

Kind or unkind? Will what I’m about to say uplift the person(s) I am speaking to? Will it encourage them, make them laugh, comfort them? Or will it make them feel uneasy, hurt, sad? Have you ever spoken with someone and you felt refreshed or warm or just happy afterwards? Kindness and kind words are soothing to the soul.